To want - To have

I would like to continue. But I don't think I can. I think I am being pulled back by the negative side of my personality.

I would also like to pull-out. But I can't. There's something that keeps on nagging at me, yelling at me, dragging me away from that path - trying to tell me that its not mine and that I shouldn't tread it whatever the circumstances. That I must fight the fight. Remain King. Not to be overthrown. Not to be pulled down by limping burrows of thoughts within the mind's maze. To see it through to the sunlight.

But when sunlight is always a procurement of a happy dream then how can it be a part of reality?

Lying within a corner of darkness and fear. I lie there thinking to myself on the whens and whys. And how it is that I got to this point in time. And should I ever get beyond this wall of demand that overpowers my will, will there ever be enough for the future that it is to come?

Will there, still?