Tuesday, October 31, 2006

This Rose: The Truth


This rose I hand to you
This rose is only meant for you

The choice I make
The consequence I shall in-take

Trials and tribulations
Joy and frustration
The life I live
Is for you
The choice I make
Is to be with you

Every day I live
I live for you
I live everyday
Only to die again
To see your face
Up in the high heavens

Choices we make
Are choices that already made
We can only smile
We can only face them with a glow in our eyes
Like the sunrise over the horizon
As it sets away over the sea
With the clouds moving away

My choice is you
Just as much this rose holds my love, the truth

life: born free - live & die expensively

This post was inspired by an episode by the famous old American sitcom The Golden Girls:

How many of us has always had everything done for them in the sense of being 'spoon-fed'?

There have been many moments in life when I used to remember when I was a child and never thought of the sense of gratitude that I should have to He who gave me what I have until now. And how I never ended up asking where this or that came from. Almost all my questions where driven towards knowing as to why this had happened and why it didn't happen the other way. And that was pretty much it.

We have neglected in our lives to see to it that our future is taken care of. Not in the sense that our goals and targets are laid out for us to achieve in the near and/or distant future. But rather in the sense that our future is pretty much - in simpler terms - just taken care of financially, or socially or time-wise.

Social welfare is an important lifestyle that we should look after for it is the life that we will live once we are old and retired. Probably when we are 60 or 70 - should we ever reach such an age.

Here in Oman, we don't share the financial restraints that hold one down from spending their money uselessly like the existence of such a factor in the western world. That is due much to the 'golden age' that we live under in the ruling of His Majesty over the Sultanate ever since the great renaissance back in 1970. But what about afterwards? How do we see ourselves coping with the many influences that will no doubt reflect upon the society herein?

Something to ponder on.

Sunday, October 29, 2006

blissful desires

The weather these is so beautiful and simply inspiring.

Maybe that's it. Maybe the winter season is my muse.

It's not a bad idea actually.

It makes me think of something. Westerners run away from the weather in their home country to come to the sunshine weather whereas we flee from the blistering heat to the cold climate. A vice versa effect, is it not?

It could be easily compared to having something we want yet cannot have to something we don't actually want but have. There are several reasons why we would not have something we desperately want in our lives. Take for instance me. I have a tendency to spend cash on things other people would categorize as 'useless' and a 'lost short-term investment', thus resulting in me running out of cash - most of the times - in hand. And if I had more in my hand, I would be in a far off worse situation, probably. So, thank God I am not rich. Besides, I am not a material person.

I guess that just got into my mind and I thought I would share it here..

stop press

Folks, I have added two new blog links to my blog roll.

One of which is BizzWhizzDubai; a blog that is dedicated to the GCC business world and the rising business ventures all over the Gulf.

Another blog is Somewhere In My Mind; which is a personal blog of someone who is dedicated to the art of poetry and is planning in the very near future to publish her first book.

If you're interested to check out either blogs, please feel free to do so.

And good luck to everyone whose venturing on their own for the first time in the blogosphere..

winter..

What's to be said about winter except for the fact that it's my most favorite season of all?

Not because here in Oman we have over nine months of hot, and often humid sunshine weather. Nor because it is the time we have a breath of fresh air sent our way because of the Indian subcontinent's monsoon season. But because it is truly a season to inspire and be inspired to do almost anything that could come up on your mind.

Although I am a summer child, I love the winter. It makes me feel loved and relaxed. I had read somewhere in a published article in an Arabic newspaper that experts say this is due to the influence that the season has on us - human kind - as to how it makes us feel relaxed, loved especially those who still remain in the 'singles' category.

I remember a lot of times when I used to just walk around in the winter times and allow myself to be gushed down by the pouring rain. Just getting soaked. It makes me feel somehow alive. Especially that time back in the late '90s when it poured cats, dogs, frogs and camels. The whole Muscat area was flooded. It was spectacular. It hadn't rained or poured down like that ever before nor afterwards.

Those were the time where we would go off to the beach at the climax of such weather.

Ah. Those were the days, I swear.

"Those were the days my friend
I thought they'd never end.
"

Saturday, October 28, 2006

The Fake Smile


Shadow to flame
From no-nothing to fame
Irresistable the wind, to tame
Changes of whim, but no complaint

Stay the course, I say to myself
Lost in my emotions that I try to control
Smile that fake smile
Inside you might die, but outside all you can do is fake a smile

Turn inside your soul
Turn inside your thoughts

Thoughts shout out inside
'Learn to live your life'
And my soul clashes away
My inner self wants to push away
Break the chains down
Hit at something
And I wake up from my day-dream..

All I can see is the candle's flame

Telling me that life is too short to contemplate on
Life need not be sad but what you have is what you got

Make sure to make it a happy one

I rise up
I wipe my tears away
And I smile
A smile that just fades away..

Friday, October 27, 2006

juggling the world - part 1


How is it possible that the whole world is plummeting all at one time and in the same direction?

You have Bush and his war policy on Iran and his barring on funding stem cell research; Israel with an upcoming visit to Qatar (something I never expected to happen again); North Korea just bursting to move check-mate; and worst of all, still nothing being done to help the Lebanese regain anything back in their long dispute against Israel with its low jet fighters flights over their own territory.

Why worry about this when I should be more concerned about what's going on in my own country? Because, ladies and gentlemen, our country isn't going to be this peaceful for long. For if the current Sultan of Oman passes away by natural causes there will be so much speculation as to what the next move would be. The Omani tribes will seek it as an opportunity to take it to their favor and God knows if this will develop into military feud such as Iraq, Afghanistan. May God give His Majesty a long healthy life fulfilled with peace and tranquility.

Not all Omanis are morons, you know. Actually, a lot of them are very educated. The error lies in the way they are raised upon which fundamentals in terms of religious and traditional beliefs.

Take for instance the Hijab situation that is being raised up in the UK and Europe. This dispute would have never had happened had the ladies who call themselves followers of the faith put up a curtain over their head just not to let anyone let see their faces. That's completely and utterly stupid. Islam states in the Qur'an that a Muslim women is to cover her hair, her arms up to her hands and all other parts of her body that could be revealing to the naked eye. The fact that these faithful women claim that cover her face is part of Islam is a complete lie and a total mix-up between religion and tradition. Something our Saudi friends would know more about than anyone else in the world.

Because of them, there were people who came up with the plot for 9/11 and strict 'Islamic' values when everyone in the world knows - well, everyone who has been educated about Islam - that Islam is a religion of mercy and not one that is 'spread by the sword' as the current Pope would claim according to his citing of a historic quote. But that's another story altogether.

It would be wrong to assume that Arabs are ruled by a dictatorship. But then again, it would be the same if one were to conclude that we are lead by a democracy. It is of the both that we are now living. And that, comparing to other world societies that live and die each die is a hell of a lot better than anyone else has in terms of problems and solutions adhered to.

Looking at the world in this perspective, I would have to say it is more like playing chess or playing pool only in a more complicated manner and on a more broader horizon..

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Links:

- Michael J. Fox makes stem cell ads

- Iran 'steps up nuclear programme'

- Israeli minister to visit Qatar

- UN united but will North Korea listen?

- In quotes: Global reaction to conflict

Thursday, October 26, 2006

actions speak louder than words

If everyone had the key to the solution of their everyday problems then this wouldn't be a life. There wouldn't be an experience to be taught. No lesson to be learned.

We've all wished once in our lifetime that we had things our way and we've had our share of times that we have a painful walk-in to a mental brick wall. Unfortunately, for some of us, that happens more than often.

And the thing is, that with everything going against the wind and in our face there's always a bit of hope that is distinguishable in the pattern of things. The saying 'the glass is half empty' can be manupilated and perceived in so many different ways according to the person it implies to. Thus, relying very much on various factors such as the psychological state of that individual being the most influential of them all.

In Islam, it is taught that you don't have all your days working with you and that there would be days where you would be asked to be patient and always remember your creator as it is just a test to see how you get through and should you succeed, then the rewards are very beneficial.

It is also taught that there are also other people with similar problems, therefore, a little temperance in what the person is getting involved with.

There are people all over the world that have far worse problems than us, people who are dying, people who have lost loved ones, people who have sicknesses that take off more in life than what it is taking from us.

Wednesday, October 25, 2006

the Kodak moment

I'm sure everyone who is reading this would agree with me on the fact that having a family orientated environment helps out a lot in creating the best atmosphere to have laugh; joke around and just be who you really are without one single care in the world.

That's pretty much what happened when we had our annual Eid lunch with jokes being exchanged; gossip passed around along with a variety of foods and delicasies that would just make any person's mouth water by just looking at them.

Makes you just smile like a total idiot.

Makes you feel so positive that you couldn't care less what is happening other parts of the globe.

Makes you feel .. so spiritual.


Now that's what I call a Kodak moment..

Tuesday, October 24, 2006

What is Eid?


So what is Eid, really?

It is known to the entire Muslim world that the time of Eid is a time to celebrate of breaking the fast that was witnessed during the holy month of Ramadhan. But what is it really to other people?

To some, it would be the time that they get money as a sort of traditional reward for fasting the whole month long period. Others count is as the time that they get to see their relatives and feel the actual spiritual reward of chatting, laughing, exchanging greetings of festive Eid mood.

There are, however, those who will associate this festive period with the rather devious habits of drinking and smoking away what has been taken away from them for the entire period. Such waste to break on a such a festive occasion.

Eid, is actually a time, to remind ourselves that there others in the universe who are still in need. Eid is a time to remind ourselves not to create a standard above others and not to create classes in a society that is looked upon as the most tolerant of all. Eid is always there to remind us to give more than what we take because in giving we show our kindness and generosity as not only Muslims but as human beings in general.

So what is Eid, exactly?

What is Eid to you?

The answer lies within..

Monday, October 23, 2006

the enguinity - the love - the reason

Life is as we know is a jigsaw puzzle that needs to be put together one piece at a time and living to our expectations is part of an expectational standard that we have to live up to. In a way something that we need to gain in order be better experienced.

We crawl before we learn to stand. We walk before we ran. We paddle before we can swim.

Like so, we have to learn to accept the fact that life will offer us the good as well as the bad order to be completely fair. Our judgements are merely clouded by our emotions because we let the happiness get to our sense to let us think we are having the best time of our lives as is the case with having turbulence too, to let us think that we are experiencing the worst time of our existence.

At a time when our emotions cloud our better judgement, they also influence our other senses, our sense of touch, smell, taste, sight and hearing aid, too. Influencing all these senses to work in the direction that the chemicals within us react to such a situation to go into.

A true fascination.

What am I getting at?

The enguinity of God's creation at how He created the reasons for us to understand ourselves better in all manners and aspects.

The love He has for all subjects to create them in such a perfect form.

The reason behind why every single one of us should contemplate twice if not thrice before making hasty decisions or saying something stupid or letting our tongue loose at anytime, at all.

Sunday, October 22, 2006

Eid anticipation

Some will remember this day as the last day they will fast.

Others will remember this as the day that they said goodbye until another year of goodwill, peace and spiritual tranquility. Something that they will probably never face in their entire lifetime and perhaps even emotional equilibruim.

The sun is over the horizon and people are running off to home not to break their fast. Children leave their milkshakes and little toys. Everyone is glued to their local channels.

Silence is amongst the streets.

No music can be heard.

The streets are dead until such a loud sound breaks out.

The sound of the sunset prayers..

A few minutes later on.. after everyone has broken their fast..

It's announced on the local television channel.

The Sultan Qaboos Grand Mosque


Since I had forgotten many times over to post a picture of the Grand Prophet - PBUH - mosque, I am posting a link to all those who want to know or would like to get a basic idea of what it looks like inside a mosque and what it takes to establish one such as the Sultan Qaboos Grand Mosque that can be found on the way towards Seeb..

Links:

The Sultan Qaboos Grand Mosque

Bird's-eye view of the Grand Mosque

Saturday, October 21, 2006

decisions.. decisions..

Why life has to be so dull at times is beyond me.

You'd just rather have time stop in the middle so you can grasp that moment to savor the flavor. The flavor of silence. Where no one in this entire universe can reach you at all and you get to see the whole world pass you by for all the glory it holds.

You would be able to watch the moon..the stars, the clouds, the people, the stray dogs, the mindless beggar, the sobbing child, but it still won't matter to you.

Why?

Because it's your moment.

Why bother make a decision, when you can sit back and enjoy that peaceful moment?

Is Hope False?

Bleed
Do I bleed?

Sleep
Do I sleep?

Weary
Is my pain

Tired
Is my brain

Fling of desire
Loneliness is hopelessness and it's satire

Brush of hope
Dab of a smile hidden
Hidden within the soul
Until the day you come out of your hide, smitten

Sun shine rays fall down on my face
Moonlight beckons to cry along with me
The single night is cold and lonely
The life I live is eager to know when you'll be here with me
And I tell them all
I tell them that it would come one day
And only that day would take all this away

Sleep
Do I sleep?

Dream
Do I dream?

Cry
Do my eyes shed a tear

In my sleep
Do I cry away
In my dreams
I dream of meeting you one day
Sleep
In the hope of meeting you the very next day

Tell me now
Should I hold on to this non-existant hope?

Friday, October 20, 2006

Friday - the last Friday

Normally, on a day like this, I would be all smiles.

But, today was different.

Today, I stepped into the mosque with my entire body begging me to cry.

Just: cry.

Cry for forgiveness? Cry for repent? Cry out of happiness?

No.

Cry for help from God.

Cry to help me get rid of my bad aching head that's just been thinking and thinking to rise up to the occasion.

As I stood to pray, I stood with anticipation just wanting someone to pat me on the back. Just to let go of all my feelings.

True I was in a mosque and that I should be focusing on the Imam's words more than anything else. But I couldn't help myself. Everywhere I see and look is a question mark to me. A book with blank pages. A dried up pen.

I knelt down everytime to put my head in respect of God and asked that He would just wipe away my heart from all grudges. From the heaviness that it holds within my chest. From the unhealthy being that I am and have been all these past hours.

Prayers had been done and finished with.

Yet.

I lay still. Feeling that I wanted to stay behind to ask again for a solution for my solitude in life. To ask that I would see a smile one day that would make my day and take all my problems away. To ask that I could push forward with the help of my beating heart; my lively soul, and the logic that my mind has been gifted with as has been the rest of human kind.

Today; I shed a tear.

I'll See You When I See You

So we're only waiting to meet each other
To see into each other's eyes
To glance at one another
And to feel our hearts fluttering away inside

We're only waiting for that time when
I would look at you
And you would look at me
And something would just click and then
We would smile as if we knew that
We didn't get why we were feeling that way but yet we understand
That our lives on that day would have changed forever

And since we're waiting for that day
We might as well have fun at it
Laugh and play
As if we were children yet with a responsible trait

We only know as much as we are allowed to know
That much is the solid truth
But I know this much:
I'll see you when I see you

Thursday, October 19, 2006

round up developments

Tomorrow would mark the last Friday during the holy month of Ramadhan. Making my visit tomorrow, inshallah, the last, also, during the same period. Not that I am considering not going anymore since the month is just almost over.

On the contrary, I plan to move on with this small development in my personal life and I hope it would develop me along the way.

It's said that should a person go for Friday prayers, then God would light his way between that afternoon and the next Friday prayer coming. In a sense, that He would make things sort of easier on that person between the first and the second weekend.

On a different note, Eid holidays have been officially announced for the private and oil sector at 3 days and 4 days, respectively. I find it very hard to understand why we have to go through the same arguement of why the whole country shouldn't take a unified holiday altogether instead of individual sectors driving their employees half crazy just to lead a profitable career. I feel sorry for all those who work in those two sectors because they won't have much fun during the holidays celebrating this momentous occasion.

No news as of yet, officially, of changing the weekend from a Thursday-Friday to a Friday-Saturday, but it's almost sure that this change will happen by the beginning of the new year; 2007.

And, I guess, that would be a rap..

Blogger's boo boo

You'll have to all excuse the change of the blog's template.

As, while I was attempting to blog in the early morning hours and tabbed around to publish it, blogger went and deleted the whole template rendering me helpless but having to go and resurrect the old blog's template with touch here and there.

And until I find another blog template more suitable than the last one, I will be sticking to this one.

A lesson to all you people from this; back up your existing template script in a text document and keep it on your PC just in case something as messed up like this happens to you.

Hopefully, it won't.

Retaliation

There's only one way to beat a down mood, in my opinion.

That's to kick it's ass.

Basically, that means for me to move on like nothing happened whatever it was that had happened. And that, although it is going to be tough on the feelings, the only way to get over it is to suck it up and be a man about the whole thing.

Sure, I'll cry a tear every now and then. And yes, I will be broken hearted just a tad bit over such a situation which only I landed myself in. But then again, who's ever heard of a perfect human being?

No one. Because there is no such person on the face of this Earth that holds such a trait.

The future will hold what it holds, and I can only attempt to live on happily even though I could be lying to myself, but it would be hell of a lot better than someone who is down, depressed, lonely, and doing nothing to change that situation yet complaining about it. Right?

I can only live every day to it's own because what I can do is limited, in a sense - my hands are tied.

I can only move on, put a smile on my face and hope to God that whatever was taken away from me this time wasn't meant to happen this time either because God has something much better in store for me.

I wish He'd just fast forward to that moment, though.

Wednesday, October 18, 2006

Life's Ordeals

You ever get that feeling of driving away in your car far far away from everything, just to think things through?

That's exactly how I feel.

I feel like I want to take my car and just drive far far away from everything that's surrounding me to be able to think. It's like I have this contradicting feeling within me whereby one part of me wants someone to be there - kind of like a standby - in case I want to ask, or take out something in rants but at the same time I want to be left alone.

I have always had this dream where I share the same notion of that of 3anooda's; where I want to start living on my own but for an altogether different reason and purpose. I want to start living on my own to learn to be independent in all manners of life. To learn to be more responsible in any affair that comes my way; health-wise; responsibility issues; and getting to know life up-close and personal.



Take me away
Gush me away with your waves
Take my heart and give me a new one
My soul cannot take another day of pain
My bleeding will not stop
My cut won't stop the throb
I feel like one day
I will let go of the rope and take my life away

Part of me wants to give in
The other part tells me to hold on
I'm stuck in the middle
Contemplating on them both

What should I do?
What should I say?
When there is no moon to enlighten my night?
When there is no sun to shine my everyday of life?

And is it really called a life?

For if life was about work
And just getting up to eat, drink and sleep and wake up to the next day
Then perish the soul that would try otherwise
To feel
To touch
To express what they conceal
To hold onto the security inspite of life's ordeal

Take my heart away
Render me soul-less for this isn't a life I wish to have
I don't care what you might say
This is what I have come to understand

Interesting Post

I've just posted something new on Arabia Calling that calls out on an analyzation on the latest speech that the new Pope gave unto the Christian world that clearly disrupted the entire globe in all manners of religion; Muslim; Jews; and other faiths.

Check it out the link, below.

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Link: Mohammed's Sword

Royal Decree

On the occasion of the upcoming Eid Al Fitr holidays, His Majesty Sultan Qaboos bin Said - Sultan of Oman has issued a Royal Decree to have the holidays for the entire government sector and all other institutions that are enlisted under it for a whole week beginning from Saturday 21st October, 2006 to 27th October, 2006.

That would mean the entire government sector gets 9 whole days if you count this Thursday and Friday, and the next Thursday and Friday. Lucky people, mashallah.

Have fun with your holidays, people

Tuesday, October 17, 2006

Reality Misses A Hole

The view from up here
Is crystal clear
Help me, God
For my heart, do I fear

To live alone
To stay alone
My entire life

To know what it is
To feel what it is
How it is to know that there is someone right there by your side

I've shut out the entire world
I've closed the door on my heart
I've shunned out the people closest to me
All because of a dream, of that spark

Help me, God
You're the only one who knows how I feel
I feel like I am only here
Just wasting my time
And I know that thinking like that is wrongly

The view from up here
Is crystal clear
If only it was like this
In reality

Eid Mubarak in advance


Eid Al Fitr has been - astronimically - announced that it will be on the 24th of October, 2007.

I am jumping the gun and taking this opportunity to greet you all a Eid Mubarak on this joyous occasion. I hope that everyone of you will have fulfilled their utmost desires by the time it is upon us and that you would come to finish your life's ambitions by next year, inshallah.

The Hated Feeling

There's a part I read last night in Mfateeh Al Jinan that says the best thing to do when someone is feeling heavy on the chest from thinking bad thoughts -whatever they may be - to say a few times To God I submit my willing (loosely translated).

And God knows that I need to do that now.

Today while watching a few DVDs, I had a bad thought that I was imagining myself going out into the parking lot with a baseball bat in my hand and the rage of the world in my mind, and a destructive passion to just destroy everything around me. And I was just walloping away at my car time after time. I was actually feeling the anguish and pain behind it. I don't know what summoned such a thought in my mind.

But that's just one of the thoughts that lingers in my brain when I am left alone like that.

You might think I am crazy or nuts or would rather call up the nearest nut house near me if you know me but this is the first time this has happened ever since my 'mystery' happy mood has gulped me up.

I hate feeling like this..

Monday, October 16, 2006

Last Night

Yesterday night I wasn't able to blog much because I was busy with reading a few pages of a book called Mfateeh Al Jinan. Which is basically a book that holds all the prayers for any occasion or celebration or incident that could ever happen to mankind to help overcome whatever it is.

Yesterday was a special night in Ramadhan, which is the reason why I grabbed the book. It was one of the nights that holds the potential to be Laylat Al Qadr.

I started on the section around 12am because I had gotten the prayers mixed up so obviously I had to start all over again by the time I found the right ones. The purpose of this 'ritual' is to stay up reading the prayers and ask God for forgiveness whilst hoping the whole the He would.

I finished reading my 'part' by the time it was around 1am.

I couldn't open my eyes after that hour and just went to sleep..

It's a first... in Oman

The first ever peaceful strike to ever happen in the history of the Sultanate of Oman has occurred today at Rusail Power Plant when the company's management gave 79 employees a notice of three months ahead to find another job elsewhere due to change in management.

This is the first ever strike ever to happen in Oman ever since His Majesty The Sultan Qaboos bin Said - Sultan of Oman - issued a Royal Decree that allowed individuals the right to do so in a peaceful manner without the need for force.

In other news around the Sultanate; Oman finally has a second television programme channel of which will start broadcasting on the beginning of next month - November, 2007.

The new channel will broadcasting different sports events, GCC Arab serials, amongst other programs. This is amongst the new developments along which the Sultanate has allowed other private programme channels to broadcast within the legal borders of the country and to air programs that would better suit the market's taste in the perspectives of their owners eyes.

---

Links:

- Shabiba (Arabic)

Sunday, October 15, 2006

The Hospital Appointment

Today I went to the hospital for my appointment and for that dreaded bone injection.

First up were the blood works, which, thank God, were far far better than what they were the last month as my Hgb level stood at 12.6 in comparison to last month's 9.8. So, I guess my eating habits aren't all going to waste.

Then came the time for me to get the bone medicine. Now in all honesty, I was planning to come to the hospital at an early hour of say, 8ish, but because I slept late after watching a couple of new DVDs that I had purchased at the hour of 5:30am; I woke up at around 9am, fell asleep again, then 10am, fell asleep again, then finally got up at 11am.

I had to rush out of the house without anything to eat, and no medicine so I can get to the hospital. Thank God that the roads weren't as congested as I feared they would've been. See, if I had gotten there earlier, I would finished a lot earlier, too. But since I got to the hospital by 11:30am I only finished from there at around 5pm. Which is kind of cutting it real close.

I slept the medicine off since it was only going to take 2 and a half hours. By the time I got up, everything was prepared for me, the new medication, new appointment. All I needed was to get back home.

Fancy that, eh?

Thank You For Smoking



This is a movie I have been waiting for so long.

A comedy about how a man filters the truth about the tobacco industry and lives up to his reputation about how cigarette companies worldwide have cause dilebrately different types of bodily cancers and still manages to be a perfect role to his 11 year old boy at home.

This movie has now been released in Muscat on DVD and is still on the wait-list for the theatres as with all the latest Hollywood releases.

You can view information about the movie here. Whereas you can watch a trailer about it here (Quicktime 7 required).

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Links:

- Official 'Thank You For Smoking' movie site

- Download link for iTunes with Quicktime 7

Return of The Blue Ribbon Woman

She opened the window letting in the winter air
Gazing at a star, says while she stared
I wonder if he is really out there?

Putting her hand on her heart
Feeling her heart beat away
Surrender thy emotion and come here to stay

He'd pass in the street
Lonely in it's dark shadows
Thinking of what to expect tomorrow
Thinking of what it is to do with his feeling of sorrow

Looking up at the sky, so high
The moon lit up so bright
Shedding a tear in the corner of his eye
He wished for a chance to start over again his life

What they both didn't know
What they both didn't seek
Was the hope of another tomorrow
That their footsteps would once to, lead

A few years on
Separated by circumstances
They lived on
To see life as it is

Passing by with his friends at a gathering
He glanced her and his heart missed a beat
He couldn't believe his eyes
It was the same woman he thought he saw a long time back
The only one with a blue ribbon on her hair
All he could do was gasp

Maybe it was just coincidence
Maybe it was meant to be
Whatever it was
He longed for those deep brown eyes, the passion that within them lies; dare yet again life to trip him by the knee

Bones

So, today I have my visit to the hospital early in the morning which would include some usual blood works and and a sit with my doctor to give me the overview of my health condition so far.

Another thing that's included within the visit this time is an I.V. supplement of some bone medicine, that, for the life of me, I still haven't gotten used to prounouncing correctly. This medicine is given over a 3 hour period that may or may not include pain because the medicine actually gets pumped through your veins in the direction of the bone marrow.

Really painful stuff last time I had it.

But hopefully it won't be as painful this time, inshallah.

Wish me luck, people..

Saturday, October 14, 2006

Is It Wrong?

Is it wrong to admit how I feel for you?
How my heart yearns for you?
How my pulse races at the sight of you?

Is it wrong for me to say that I adore your presence?
That I would love for us to talk 24/7?
That the only thing I have on my mind is to see you at a glance?

I tell myself sometimes that I am torturing myself for nothing
That the outcome would never become what I ask of it

But in my heart I feel
The feelings that I try painfully to conceal
When it is you I see
When you just smile at me

Welcome to Muscat, Oman


Splendid weather. Absolutely wonderful.

People. If you don't come to Oman this winter you will regret it for the rest of your life.

Winter is the single most busiest time when Oman actually becomes really nice and cold in a whole year. When it actually rains. When you actually feel nice cold breezes. Provided you come bundled up with everything you need to warm yourself up during the period then you wouldn't have a worry.

Bring your family over. Enjoy the weather. And when all is almost over, then you would have the upcoming Muscat Festival 2007 in January up until February. You would be able to enjoy the great atmosphere of long uninhabited natural beaches and walk along a shore line which spreads as far as the eye can see and sit down to a sunset that would draw any lovable connection between you and your most beloved ones.

And when it's time to get some grub, you can drop by a barbeque sell out place on the way back to your place of stay, and choose from mutton, chicken, Squid or even Corn on the cob.

Don't miss this chance, you'll be forgoing the chance to see Oman at a glance and most pleasurable atmosphere for another whole year.

---

Links:

- Destination Oman

- Oman Air

- Gulf Air

- Emirates

- Omani Tourism Ministry

- Omani Information Ministry

Friday, October 13, 2006

Friday: the 3rd visit


This week seems like it has gone on so fast that I never noticed that it was a Friday until last night (Thursday night). And it has been a really great week, too. I'm hoping that the next week and the weeks to come after this would be just the same if not better.

We got to the Friday prayers today a bit late into the first lecture but in all honesty, I felt really calm the minute I heard the Imam's voice. It was nice, soothing, and the topic was even more interesting; Lailat Al Qadr.

Since I had missed the important parts, I didn't get a chance to know what are the ways to properly pray for forgiveness on that special night. Although there was a mention that it was preferred to study the Qur'an and pray until dawn on the 23rd of Ramadhan because it holds some significance. If someone out there knows what that specific significance would be, please let me know here.

There was also a mention about someone called Sahib Al Zaman. Now, you'll have to forgive me, because I don't recall the names of all the Prophets but I do however remember that there is no mention of such a name. Unless it is a nickname like Abu Baker Al Sadeeq. Would someone clarify this piece of information on that person, please?

Setting aside that serious tone in this post, I also saw this little boy, who could be probably not much older than 4 or 5 years old and he was attempting to pray alongside his father. The cute thing about it was that he was doing everything wrong in such an innocent manner. That really made my day. It made me smile like a freak the whole time we were in the mosque. Which reminds me that I forgot to take a picture of the mosque from the outside to post it here. No one reminded me. Oh, well.

Today was by far the best beginning of all my days. I feel really happy.

Until next week..

Tagged


3anooda tagged me for no reason to post my desktop screen. I don't normally do tags but this time I am making an exception.

Here you go and enjoy..

Thursday, October 12, 2006

Eid's Blessings

It's amazing. Just absolutely amazing.

We're over halfway into Ramadhan already.

Would you believe it? I certainly can't. I'm amazed at the fact that it has passed by so fast - mind you, it's something we all notice everytime this month comes by every year. So it's not exactly new to the people who live through it. Even those who aren't fasting it.

And imagine, 10 days from now we could be celebrating Eid, inshallah.

That'll be the day when everyone gets together. Sits down and laugh, joke, share a few tales and ask about each other and how they've been for the time they haven't seen each other. There will be those who will have differences who will reconcile in the spirit of the moment. There'll be the joy of sharing your happiness with everyone you know and you don't know.

The children who will come on that day to ask for their money - Eiddiya - and you would gladly give them their heart's desire. The positiveness on that day will be so reflecting, you would think it's Heaven on Earth, in a manner of speaking.

There'll be the hope of having a new year full of hope, full of goals fulfilled, full of re-energized willpower and a stronger faith in God that all He has planned out for us is in our benefit if we just don't take anything for granted and live our lives to the hope that that we would live forever in everyday we live and to live everyday as if it was last day.

It's great to live life positively as if the sun will never set in your horizon..

Generation Next

It's a shame we take for granted the things we cherish the most only when we lose it.

Take for instance the surrounding environment, the greenery and the peace and quiet we used to have in our area - Madinat A' Sultan Qaboos.

Progress comes in and brings in the promise of new technology, new jobs and the promise of a better future of which we all hope for and not the noise and racket of people riding their quad-bikes in humidity that ranges between 80% - 95% around the block of a residential area, and a public commercial area that is highly populated at night, and certainly not during the time of Ramadhan, time and time again.

I remember the time when the place around there was nice and quiet and the only thing you ever worried about was whether you would get a parking space, or if the weather during the winter time got really bad to the point where you would get drenched in your clothes and you would shelter under the protection of the commercial buildings.

It's a shame the younger generation seems to miss out on all of this and only sees that fun can be generated by annoying the Hell out of everyone else they pass by with their noisy habits of chit-chatting loudly as if they are at home, or with their loud and rather skimpy and simply insulting loud fashion sense during a religious time such as Ramadhan.

I never thought I would live to hear myself say this but God help me and anyone else who is bothered by such unfashionable out-tastes if we are to live for at least another 30 or 40 years.

I, for one, will never allow my children to become like that, inshallah.

Wednesday, October 11, 2006

Only You Can Make Me Feel This Way

I don't understand what it is that's got me hooked onto you
I would just love to know

Is it your smile?
Is it your personality?
Is it the way you always
Make me want to be me?

I'm glad as ever, ever since I have gotten out
I'm over the moon for my new life
I really am cherishing my life as if it's all turned anew
And this time it's got nothing to do with you

But I question myself everytime I'm on my own
Say, that I do succeed in what I am about to venture onto
Say, that I do get along and taste the fruits of all my past labor
Who am I to share it with?
Who am I to be happy about it with?
Whom, is it, will I be staring into their dark eyes - brown, not blue?

I would love nothing but to get on with my life
But life isn't a life without someone such as you
To compare you
Would be comparing the world to your eyes
Your presence
Your smile

Forgive me
I try to conceal what I feel inside
But I can't
When it's you all I can think about

The crave for a shake

Oh, I'm going to love next Sunday.

And that's me being sarcastic, by the way..

Why Sunday of all the days?

Because I will have my hospital appointment which will require me to get up really early in the morning in order not to get in the mix of the traffic on the way there. Not to mention what will be waiting for me. A nice three hour long wait injection of painful bone injection. One that would literally make a baby out of any man.

Literally.

But, that's next Sunday, so what should I do with the rest of the days before that appointment? Absolutely nothing but have the time of my life. Which is exactly what I am doing with certain consideration to the Ramadhan period situation.

It'll give me a chance to visit some people I know in the wards who I was hospitalized alongside in my time of weakness and catch up with them on their developments. Maybe even share some Biryani with them.

I wonder if they have milkshakes in the hospital?

Here's One I Made Earlier

Sometimes you can have some really bad luck in one night that really brings you down and there would be two different approaches you can take it in.

One would be the obvious way; that's by feeling really bad about and letting it consume you to the inner core to where it just screws up your whole evening whilst baring your teeth with an angry personality against everyone you know and you don't know. In such a case, I would have acted very sarcastically about every single thing that went on around me. Sort of a comic relief act if you know what I mean.

But that was the old me.

The second approach taken up by the new me is the one that just lets things like these pass them by without paying attention to them apart from trying not to make the same mistake twice. Acting with a positive attitude about the whole incidence. Keeping the confidence within that somewhere, there's a chance for me waiting, inshallah. And if not, who cares? I was having a good time with a few friends of mine and that's all.

And that's one I made earlier...

You only live your life once, why bother making it such a bad mess when you can take it to your advantage and just have fun with every passing moment?

Tuesday, October 10, 2006

D.A.R.E.

As you may have undoubtedly have noticed there have been some developments in my blog environment.

Amongst the developments is that we now have two new members in the new blog Arabia Calling; being void and 3anooda along with Arabized & MD. However, the door is still open for those who wish to offer their humble contributions to the above mentioned blog in any topic they wish, as no subject is taboo. If you're interested in such a thing, please send me an email on: pennedthoughts@gmail.com, and I'll add you as soon as possible.

Another advancement is the fact that I had been invited by void to join his blog BizzWhizzDubai; which offers contributions in matters of the business sector in Dubai in many aspects.

Having gotten that over to the side, I would just like to say that it is an overwhelming feeling of excitement to embark on something completely new and fascinating that you find interesting in the sense that you are good in. Such as the business idea that I and my partner are working on and as far as the blogosphere goes.

It's the matter of daring to be bold and trying instead of having to think about every single thing and then regretting and what is and what not. For, if everyone just sat in their own place doing that, the whole world would have not evolved.

It's amazing what one can learn from small lessons.

Wishes


I wish I could talk to you
I wish I could sit down and tell you what's going on my mind

I wish there was some way
This whole situation would just turn around
If life is like this all the time

If the sun kept on burning 'til the end of time

The passion in my heart
The desire that within me is still in sparks
The day I live everyday as if night
The feeling that eats me inside
I just can't live without you by my side
I try to think of something else

I try to .. get my mind occupied
I try to .. doing something anew with my life
But it's all a front
It's all but a mask I wear

Nothing seems to matter more than you
Nothing seems to matter than getting me to your heart
Nothing is worth giving up - that's true
But then again, no one's ever met someone as true-hearted as you

Monday, October 09, 2006

Tranquility


Yesterday was a stepping stone forward on the way to start a new business with a partner of mine. Something that I had never thought I would ever do. Now that got me pretty excited by the end of the night.

I finally had something to occupy me. Something that I know I can handle and that will not ever - inshallah - affect my health status. Something that will definitely bring a smile to my face. Well, in time to come.

This Ramadhan has been good to me so far. In the sense I haven't had to go into hospital like the last two years or so. I have great friends who are there most of the time when I need them and as I will be there for them when they need me. And I have a goal set out for me that I intent follow on until the end, because at the end I wouldn't know if it is successful if I hadn't tried.

I am thankful. Thank you, God.

Trick or treat

I hate it when you see a person and that you know and that person knows who you are and just walks by. It's like you don't exist for that specific reason. Like you didn't matter. Then what's to stop you from being bad and mean to that exact same person you know of for the rest of their life?

Absolutely nothing but your your conscience - 'let your conscience be your guide' runs in your mind like a broken record.

Imagine that you're somewhere and you both know each other, and you're all set to say your greetings, yet there is no gesture from the other side - so you stay in your frozen up position, feeling confused, angry, and perhaps even sad.

There is just no getting over that. Especially when you meet that person all of a sudden again with someone you know and they make it look like nothing happened on that day.

So what choice do you have but to play along and try not to turn it into a childish situation whereby you don't greet the other party for that reason. Unfortunately, this is what happens with me most of the time. If not all the time, except when I am with my friends. I know for a fact I didn't earn that behavior from certain people which I cannot name. And I know I am far better than them just because I don't degrade myself to that level.

But don't think for one second that if I do go around smiling and greeting - for example, where it was you - that I had forgotten the whole situation. Never. 'Absolutely', as Mohammed Sa'ad would once say in one of his movies.

I may glow up in smiles.

I may be all nice.

But I am no dope to trickeries.

Sunday, October 08, 2006

Back on track

Back to thy normal self, once again.

I have thought about the whole issue that must be dealt with in my head, of which was a private problem of mine and concluded to the fact that it must be dealt with the utmost proficiency - ever. And that would be by focusing on the bigger picture.

Many were the times that I skewed off track because I would have a few minor problems, accumulatively, would own up to be one major diversion that deviated me from the major issue at my hands.

Well, not this time.

I refuse to give in to the circumstances that are bellowing me into that dark grave of wonder; depth and depression.

I have to focus on getting better. On finishing the job that I started. After all, it said that God loves His subjects most when they finish what they started and when they do something that they're especially good at.

Right?

Rewards, Reapings & Rapture

Woah..

Muscat's humidity level is sizzling, I have to tell you. It must have been 100% today if not 200%.

Wow.

But on a more serious note, my bad side is trying to overcome me again and I am doing my utmost best to control it because it is just bad feeling this way. Like I am out of control. A feeling of confidence. A feel that everything is supposed to go the way you hoped and wished it would.

Keeping it inside is a business on it's own, that I have to admit.

So I am trying my best to find a part-time thing to get my mind busy in the meanwhile. Something that will engage me into anything else than this depressive mode of thinking and personality.

I already have something that I am working on but I won't announce it now, yet. I'll announce it when the the other party has given me the permission since it is more business orientated.

On another hand, though, there is some good news that has come out today which is of the past - remember that song that a friend of mine had composed to sell through for several Omani charitable associations? Well, ever since the UN tossed his project aside, he had worked out a deal to get it privately funded and drive it off the shelves with no profits gained whatsoever. The singer/writer/composer behind I'm Innocent said that the CD will be ready this week to be sold for 2 rials each at almost everywhere you could think of buying anything (if that makes any sense)..

Just be sure to be on the look out for it at any Shell Select, Al Maha Souq, or Oman Oil quick-store. All proceeds will go directly towards Omani charitable associations in all their categories.

So, show us your Ramadhan spirit, people.

Saturday, October 07, 2006

Missing You


I only miss you as much as I miss the sun on a rainy day
I only want to see you and your smile on your sweet face

This is how you make me feel

You only make me feel this way when I see you
And when I don't; I wish I did
And when we don't meet, I'd wish for the Earth to collapse
Thunder should roar in relapse
Winds should gust
Just to take the feeling that I feel right now


I miss you so much
I'd cut my heart out

A Slidy Issue

I don't want to give in to the chance of letting a bad mood get to me. I want to always be happy because it feels really good to be happy. And it's just not fair that just a couple of things that upset you for some small time would get to you and bring your whole efforts to a halting stop.

I just refuse to let that happen.

And I will not let it happen.

And I can talk about this for so long but that would make me look hypocritical to everyone out there and before that, to myself. Something that I cannot ever accept ever by anyone - whoever it is.

I guess I'll let it slide this time..

Friday, October 06, 2006

Friday Prayers: Questions of the Soul


"God is great" in traditional Arabic calligraphy


So today I went again to another Friday Prayer, the second in a row.

I had a bad headache on the way there and somehow wasn't feeling good, maybe because I had rushed into things to get there early.. which I did, thank God.

It was empty by the time I got to the mosque (remind me next time to take a picture of the mosque from the outside) and I thought I had just missed the beginning, but it turns out that I was the one who got there early, very early - like 20 minutes early. Hmmm.. must time myself.

Squibble, squabble.

Today's Friday prayer lecture was something that frustrated me a bit. Maybe it was due to the fact that I hadn't gone to a single mosque lecture for a very long period of time so I wasn't used to being talked to without having to ask a question in the middle of a 'conversation'.

The topic was spirituality and how people's actions in this holy month of Ramadhan are relevant in such a field & how the lecturer had segregated the 'ritual' of fasting into three different groups; fasting that is known to the public; fasting of both the public type along with the spirit; and the spiritual fasting that is rarely seen these days.

The thing that frustrated me is that I had alway known fasting is just what it is; fasting. Nothing about separating it into groups or anything since fasting has it's own set of rules that you must abide by and if you can't follow those rules then it just means that you haven't been fasting - period. Rules like no cursing, no eating, no drinking; praying; following only what is good and not taking aide into things that could deter you into doing something that would anger God. Things like that.

The beauty of these lectures lies within what kind of questions they make rise out in your head about your own faith allowing you to learn about your own faith; Islam.

Thursday, October 05, 2006

Never Giving Up


Giving up isn't an easy thing to do. And if you look at it, there is a good way and a bad way of perceiving the results thereafter.

Sure there's the pain of dealing with everything, mentally and emotionally. I had learned that the moment I got out of the hospital. The day when I just gave in to everything. Succumbed. Surrendered everything to the Almighty.

But the details behind that event happening aren't as important as the lesson behind the whole incident. Being which that there are things in life you should give up to be happy. And there are, of course, things that you have give up because, well.. you just have to.. because they are out of your reach and just trying again and again and again is a painful, stressful, and very heart-aching process that you put yourself through; one which you would rather be off with.

And if you look at it this way - that you're giving up the one thing that makes you happy in order to be happy - then you're ultimately pushing yourself in the right direction. Making the right decision, if you will. That you're putting the past behind your back and starting anew.

And that is just what I did.

I started taking everything with a very positive attitude. Whatever it was. For example, my tooth broke today, and normally I get very aggravated at such a situation. But I just laughed it off. Like I was on laughing gas or something. OK. Maybe that wasn't such a great example. But you all get the point. That I am out there with ... with a newly born personality. One that is unwilling to give up on the slightest slimmest glimpse of hope. Simply because it is there. Just waiting for you to grasp it with all your might and make the best of it.

I am unwilling to give up on hope on anything right now - or ever.

The Value Of Life


An earlier view of life of mine was that of depression and being border line suicidal.

Today, I was provided with an even bigger reason to stay on the way that I am heading; the positive way.

I used to get really depressed at having to know that a friend of mine would get engaged or would have found someone they truly love in order to go down the yellow bricked road. Nowadays, I know over 7 people who are all getting either engaged or married within this married and I couldn't be happier.

Happy that they are happy; first and foremost.

A perfect reason to be so, wouldn't you think?

And it's being around people like those that you get absolutely intoxicated with the idea of happiness. It just fills you up - truly. Its like; I don't know.. they fill you up with so much hope just by seeing them. Like they have all this positive energy coming off of them and radiating onto you. Makes you smile until the muscles of your face really ache.

It makes you look at life more positively.

It makes you really value your life.

Thank God..

Wednesday, October 04, 2006

On a day like today; the sun shines away


I never knew that going out on a morning was a serious health hazard - mentally.

Slow traffic everywhere. Road works. Police interfering with traffic jams that they construct. And people who think they own the road enough to drive your blood pressure all the way up. If I had been fasting I would have broken it by now because of those factors.

But it ended up 'all good' in the end after glistening in the hot car atmosphere with the A/C on high and seeing my family at the end of the working day.

I roamed around to look what kind of business opportunities that could be sought into our area after that small round in Qurum and I may have thought up one or two that could be successful (and of course I am not going to give up the details here unless someone was to send me a money transfer of say.. at least half a million Omani Rials :P).

This reminds me, have any of you applied for a piece of land through the post office back when the 'offer' was still standing? I had applied a long time back, the names keep getting published but neither mine or a few friends of mine have had theirs published yet. I remember that it said on the form should there be any need for any follow up matters that the Ministry of Housing, Electricity & Water would contact the individual on the phone number provided by the applicant. I had heard a rumor that this was not the case, and that you should contact the post office you applied through to see if your name appears in a list for those who have their applications rejected. I'm hoping that mine isn't on that list should it exist.

For all you fitness buffs, Adam's Fitness Centre at MQ is on the verge of re-opening with the efforts of a few members and one or more trainers after having changed it's management and permanent location to the Ras Al Hamra club at PDO. It seems that there is a strong will to have it open here at its old location since it is more convenient than somewhere else no one is familiar to the atmosphere and ambiance that surrounds it. I guess they should have thought about that subject before making the bold move without telling their members.

Thanking God With A Great Big Smile


Maybe this is the feeling that I am feeling: the feeling of being actually 'alive'.

After all these years, I am actually living a life. Something that I can enjoy everyday. There is just no stopping this wonderful feeling inside of me. Apart from the times that I feel completely bored with my time now since I am unable to resume any type of typical 9-5 routine work because my health situation would just backfire on me again.

So what's the solution? And this is something that I have been giving serious consideration ever since I got out of hospital: my own private business. Up until now this is all still a standpoint idea that needs to be developed from the actual project idea up to the business development plan. But I am surrendering to the idea for two reasons; one it being the only logical solution that would allow me to live profitably in my life and secondly; it would allow me to be my own boss, the hours I can fix to my own ability and needs that would meet the market's in the businesses' field.

This is the decision that I will stand on from now on and I feel it is the most suitable for me in my case.

I feel so lucky that I am alive to have finally found a reason to be alive: just to live life and be .. happy.

Sure, you can't have everything in life. I'm unable to get attached to anyone because of several reasons and I am happy for that, because it would allow me to reach into myself and understand myself more to be more knowledgeable about life's needs should the time come for me. If it doesn't, then it doesn't because it's just not written for me. One should be content with what God has written for them in this life - good or bad. After all, there is a reason to everything, whether we know it or not.

You may think I am being hypocritical. But honestly I'm not.

Hypocrisy would be like all the people who always ask me why I keep going to a certain American coffee shop here in Muscat although they have heard that it shows and provides financial support towards the Israeli army. I ask those; where is your proof? The owner of the chain here in Oman has vowed that should it come to that he would disown the whole franchise in the Middle East, not to mention that a statement was provided on the world wide web about the whole issue that tackled it. And even though it was true, what would your position be if you knew the government is setting on setting up trade ties with it's 'Israeli' counterpart (again) ?

Anyhow, that's a whole side issue in this post.

I am hoping to start fasting very soon after a long time after working out a certain schedule to take my heavy medication, I am hoping that it would work out - no promises, though.

I am thankful that God has given this opportunity to take and be truly happy. To actually feel loved. To feel like the whole world is out there with open arms with a big giant smile.

Tuesday, October 03, 2006

A.I.D.S. In Oman


The first-ever public show of a concerned campaign on this growing epidemic in the Sultanate of Oman has been released in the Oman Tribune on Monday (i.e.: yesterday). If this reflects anything, then it shows that the government through its health body - the Ministry of Health - is now adopting a more serious, transparent and very public strategy towards the ill-fated disease in Oman. Something that it had not adopted ever since the first case back in 1984.

Although the official facts and figures show a small amount of people of the entire population that have inhibited the disease; I am not one to trust such figures because I believe that by the time these figures were arrived at, the status-quo had changed, if ever so slightly.

It isn't the shame of admitting of having A.I.D.S. in the Sultanate of Oman, but the shame is not admitting it at all to try to help the individual.

My Smile


Is there something in the horizon?
Is there I wonder?
If there is, let it happen right away
If there is, let it come my way

I feel a tingle
A sweet tingle
A sweet tingle of love

Every fibre of me is begging to shout out
With the greatest of delight
With a love so light

Perhaps it is my time now
Maybe things are being spun for me
Maybe there will soon come a day
When I will be awesomely happy

I feel like shouting out
With love full of delight
It's like being in love
I have never felt like this before, without a doubt

And because of this feeling inside
I always have .. a smile

Monday, October 02, 2006

Keeping The Devil At Bay


It's said that during the Ramadhan period, that the Devil clan is chained up, sent to Hell behind locked doors until the end of the month.

Literally looked at, it's an excellent opportunity for anyone who has sinned during the past to ask for forgiveness and remorse on what is upcoming. But to what end is it really true that a person's devious personality is hidden for a full 29/30 days?

We all know that no one person in this world is born perfect. Nor are they born good or bad. The fact states that whatever environment or upbringing - the child, then - has had plays a very vital role into shaping a person's future and outcome. Hence, it also plays a role in shaping the type of personality - good or bad - this person may have. This is highly due to a person's choice and the mysterious hands of fate and what options it may lay out.

A chance to change your future is as much a fantasy as it is in the movies, though. But not far fetched. So the chance to do this in Ramadhan by asking for forgiveness is something that is destined to happened by God's hands if He should will it.

Imagine a person fasting away during the whole daytime but cursing away like nobody's business at every Tom, Dick & Harry. This dis-functional person would most certainly not be attainable of this forgiveness - unless God should will it.

Everyone has their own personality and to it they owe themselves to prove that they are worthy of God's mercy upon us in this holy month by addressing the issue of keeping our 'inner devils' at bay during the period, and if at all possible, our whole lifetime.

God may have sent the Devil clan away on a vacation during the holy month, yet this does not mean that we have every excuse to do what we want unholy since there is the inner self that proposes everything bad to our very selves every second of the day.

Keeping your personality, your devil and your inner self is a battle that was meant for mankind to suffer until Judgment Day.

Change

I feel so content for some reason.

Like I have so many things on my mind to say and erupting but they remain entact. I feel like I want to shout out with joy yet at the same time I feel that I need to be sad at the same time and serious. Not that I am not a fun-loving guy, that is.

The mother of all paradoxes?

Perhaps.

What is helping me to stay content is the fact that I meet up with my friends almost every night. And that we share our laughs, our small serious discussions. But again, I stumble upon things in my mind that I feel I cannot share with anyone at all. Again, for some mysterious reason.

Am I going back to being depressed? I hardly think so, otherwise I would be really sad in the dumps.

No. Far from it. And even if I was, I would fight it.

If patients can miraculously save themselves from fatal diseases such as Cancer, then what's to stop me from shaking myself from a depression state?

I am planning - to change the routine that I am going through - to look for something that I can do in the meantime until I gain full health back. Something like a past-time job or course. And I have a few ideas already in my head.

Maybe that's all I need right now; change.

Sunday, October 01, 2006

October Weather

October's here, finally and it's still as hot as it is here in Muscat. With a slight change of weather coming down just a tad bit on humidity.

This has been going on for the past 3 years; people have been blaming the carbon gases that have had the greenhouse effect on our only Earth. And it's not like anyone in Oman is doing anything about it.

Sure, there's been plenty of talk about our environment and ways to preserve it, prevent it from detoriating but that's all that's happened. I even remember a couple of years ago there were several projects that were pledged by outside business through Muscat Muncipality and the government of Oman to open up a recycling centre in Oman to encourage Omanis to re-use products that could be like plastic bags, cardboard boxes and glass bottles. That fell through the floor, though. Why? Because the business people behind the proposed idea looked into the development plan and saw that there was no profit to be gained from such a project.

Another example that was a waste of time was when the Ministry of Environment - back then - practically chased down all the petrol-chemical companies in Oman to push them to start production of unleaded fuel and an agreement was arranged to have it start at some point in time in the last few years but to no avail. Unless the whole thing was wrapped up under the tags that most Omanis know the petrol here like Super and Normal.

And I am sorry to say, even though with the recent establishment of an NGO such as the Environmental Society Oman, I see no change in the environmental sector of the Sultanate. Like for instance, there is no push from the organization to resolve the issue to decrease the amount/number of vehicles on the roads with the increasing bottlenecking traffic that creates frustration and headache. There is a lack of plantation strategies in comparison to increasing road works over Oman with the recent re-arrangement of the cities blocks residentially and commercially. What is the point of having just to educate people in a certain field if that education isn't implemented is my question to members and the founders of the ESO.

Furthermore, where is the government from their eco-tourism strategy they boast so much about? Even with the recent development in today's news of building an aqua-cultural centre in Bandar Rowdha, it all seems so pointless if the environment remains effected in so many ways that the most simple ways to avoid such an incoming meteoric environmental disaster are just ill-used and ill-implemented by all lines of the Omani society; locals and expats alike.

I'm not saying nothing is being done by anyone here in Oman. What I am stressing though is the fact that not enough efforts are being implemented to alter the stressful environmental situation in the Sultanate of Oman.

Where Satisfaction Ends

Everyone's their own set of aspirations in their respective lives. And everyone has their own ambitions. Whether you want to be a doctor, or a fireman, a pilot or even a writer.

But the difference between those and other 'ambitions' is the standard; there are personal and there are professional or what we tend to call 'career thoughts'. What the sets the two apart is the need for such things in our lives and their priority level, whether they are needed to set our lives in a straight or curvey line.

We all know that once attained, personal ambitions are merely a stepping stone onto a new one in life due to any circumstance, but what about the professional ambitions? What about the goals we set for ourselves in life that cause us to forget about our life completely and focus entirely on the one thing in mind that matters - in our perspective of life - the most?

The red line that is drawn for our career ambitions often takes us on a wild ride until we are caught in the wind and left alone to our lonely thoughts of peril and gloom which over-ride our senses to panic and halt in the middle of the aspirational highway.

Not neglecting the need for ambtions in our lives, the need to live life from time to time is as much needed as we need air to live.

We need a breather every now and then.