Life's Ordeals

You ever get that feeling of driving away in your car far far away from everything, just to think things through?

That's exactly how I feel.

I feel like I want to take my car and just drive far far away from everything that's surrounding me to be able to think. It's like I have this contradicting feeling within me whereby one part of me wants someone to be there - kind of like a standby - in case I want to ask, or take out something in rants but at the same time I want to be left alone.

I have always had this dream where I share the same notion of that of 3anooda's; where I want to start living on my own but for an altogether different reason and purpose. I want to start living on my own to learn to be independent in all manners of life. To learn to be more responsible in any affair that comes my way; health-wise; responsibility issues; and getting to know life up-close and personal.



Take me away
Gush me away with your waves
Take my heart and give me a new one
My soul cannot take another day of pain
My bleeding will not stop
My cut won't stop the throb
I feel like one day
I will let go of the rope and take my life away

Part of me wants to give in
The other part tells me to hold on
I'm stuck in the middle
Contemplating on them both

What should I do?
What should I say?
When there is no moon to enlighten my night?
When there is no sun to shine my everyday of life?

And is it really called a life?

For if life was about work
And just getting up to eat, drink and sleep and wake up to the next day
Then perish the soul that would try otherwise
To feel
To touch
To express what they conceal
To hold onto the security inspite of life's ordeal

Take my heart away
Render me soul-less for this isn't a life I wish to have
I don't care what you might say
This is what I have come to understand